But alas by the Grace of God, I have graduated

MY UPDATE:

Last year I gave a lesson to the young girls called “Your Season of Independence”. During that lesson I talked about how everything in life has season, and that at that time it was their season to focus on God and themselves. As in, focus on your relationship with God, your ministry, your studies, and accomplishing your goals. I said one very true thing, and it was that when you do things out of season, things become harder than they were intended to be.  It’s not to say that you won’t be able to accomplish what you want, it’s just that the struggle is greater. I am a real living example of the struggle of doing things out of season.  Real life struggles, like worrying who will take care of your children, which can be quite stressful. . . But alas by the Grace of God, I have graduated! 

It was not an easy journey. I had many struggles and obstacles to overcome, and quite honestly, I think back now and wonder how I never lost my sanity. The first thing was who was going to watch my then 3 year old Benji.  I had a few moments of panic, but I am thankful for my church family who is always willing to help.  A sweet sister from my church watched him until I was able to get him into daycare. My husband would drive him to her house at like 6am, and I would take the bus to school.  We only had one car, at the time.  Then I finally got him into the daycare at my school, but now the problem was that we only had one car.  So Benji and I had to take the bus to school, and this fine… until winter rolled along. I had two 8 am classes, and I had to leave the house at 6 am to catch the bus with my then 3 year old in -30 weather.  That was brutal.  Luckily mid-winter God provided us with another vehicle, and that made things easier for us. 

First year classes were a breeze, it was mostly computer based and I found it rather enjoyable to be honest.  The thing that happened was… I got pregnant. The dilemma was that now I didn’t know what to do because I really wanted to finish school, but I also knew that with a baby I wouldn’t be able to.  So I reached out to my teacher, who was so wonderful and supportive, and she said the best thing was for me to take a year off and return after.  So after praying and discussing with hubby, that’s what I did. It was great to stay home with the kids, but I also saw the stress the finances caused on my husband. I even attempted to find a job, but never got called.  I do believe that was the will of God though, because had I worked, I probably wouldn’t have returned to school.  Seeing all my first year classmates graduating and posting about their jobs, saddened me but was also that push I needed to return to school and finish.   

The first thing about returning to school was finding who was going to take care of 9 month old baby. Luckily, a sister from church started a daycare and Jason was her first baby, and she even picked Benjamin up from school. So that was great!  Then mid semester she told me the horrible news of her returning back to work, and once again there was stress. God knows all things and prepares a way before you even know it though. God allowed my In-laws moved close to us, so FIL was able to pick Benji up from school. AND just in the nick-of-time, another sister from church became available to babysit Jason (and she still does).  I know it seems rather stranger but I promise I do not leave my baby with strangers, these are women who I love and are dear to my heart. They have been with us since the beginning of ministry and have been like mothers to me, and I am so grateful to God for them. 

3rd Semester was hard! Apart from having a young baby, a 5 year old, wife duties and ministry responsibilities, the school work load was HEAVY!!!   If there was a time where I showed time management skills, it was then. I adapted a mindset that was to do everything as soon as it was assigned. During those long breaks between classes I would not take time off, I would work through it and did everything possible to finish all my work in school. Even then, I found myself writing essays at 3am. It was quite overwhelming, but I managed to survive (zombie mode).  It was worth it though, because by the end of the semester I was able to explain the process of a civil suit, or a divorce case. I finally felt that all my efforts were worth something. 

For last semester I didn’t have any child care issues, Thank God! What happened in the month of January to mid Feb was that everyone in my home was getting sick. Like back to back, I don’t even know what, or why, or how.  All I know is that, I swear, I didn’t sleep the whole month. Even my friends in school were starting to say things like “again? Your kids are sick AGAIN?”  I had Monday’s off, and I was going to the Doctor’s office every Monday.  The receptionist there will know us forever. FINALLY everything started to go back to normal!  I missed two assignments because of these unfortunate events, but I still passed all my classes. I found a Co-op with a Spanish speaking lawyer, she hired me on right after co-op and it has been a huge blessing on my life. Lastly, yesterday was my graduation and I graduated with Distinction.  If you don’t know what that means… In my school, it is one category above honours!

So, is it possible to accomplish your dreams a little late, and out of season? Yes it is.  

Would it had been easier if I would have done it when it was intended? 100%.  You can avoid all these struggle if you just do things in their season. Keep that in mind! 

Last thing I want to say is… The biggest support I had was from my husband, since the beginning.  I applaud him for everything he has done in this journey.  Secondly my family, and my church fam has all had a part in this journey, from words of encouragement to prayers. Oh and Ms. Salazar for letting me do my interview assignment on her. The diploma is in my name, but in a sense I feel like we all graduated. 

*Shout out to Ms. Jocelyn Castro for being a reader for 5 years! YOU ROCK!  

Read my Tips for Surviving School

“He’s a natural leader” she said...

Hey there,

Long time no talk. Life has sure changed since the last time I posted something. The last time I posted was about Jason's first birthday.  I posted that way back in February, soooooo I am thinking we need to have a little update post(s).

Let's start with Benjamin,

My boy is five now. He is almost done his first year of school EVER! Can you believe?  Just yesterday I was dropping him off for his first day of school, and walking away with such a heavy heart. Let me tell ya, it never goes away.  You get used to dropping them off, but when I see him walk into the school my heart is once again heavy.  I assume it will always be this way, and I will just have to endure it. Just like every other parent has had to.   All you can do is pray!

I have attended my first parent-teacher conference. You know how they say the way to make a person feel good, is to compliment their child?  Well I have never left a place feeling so proud. The teacher raved about how MY SON, was such a compassionate person, and how he was aware of other people’s feelings. She told me about the time where Benjamin had a “grand idea”, and it was to build a pretend living room station, where all the kids could go “watch TV” and eat their snacks, AND how he formulated a plan and got all the children involved to accomplish his vision. You  “He’s a natural leader” she said, as I fanned my peacock tail. It was only for a mere moment though, because I quickly was remind that child in not my own, but belongs to God. So as I returned to my vehicle my eyes filled with tears as I thanked God for my amazing child.


Benji is a great big brother.  This title includes; looking out for his little brother, holding hands with him to ensure there are no runaways, watching your iPad together, sharing your snack and fighting over anything.  Yes they fight, they cry and mom has to be the mediator.  Just the other day I made them hug it out and they both cried. It was quite comical, but I maintained my I-mean-business face. I mean, they shouldn’t fight, but that’s what a healthy sibling relationship requires. If you have never fought with your siblings… well you might have unresolved issues. Lol. OH in case you are wondering, YES the one year old is quite the defender.

How much my boy has grown! Facebook reminds me of that almost every day.  I always go on there just to see what memories will pop up and almost every day, it is baby Benji 5 YEARS AGO! Incredible. Tear. BUT what really did it, was when my brother in law sent me a video he found of Baby Benjamin who didn’t even know how to talk yet. I cried.  Apparently the more your kids grow, the more you cry.  Truth. I cry all the time, and there are no holding back these floodgates. ha!

I will never forget when Benji approached me and said “Mom, we are family and we are in love!”, and what an accurate description that was!

Jason's First Birthday

I just wanted to do a little throwback (even though it's not Thurs) to November and share Jason's 1st birthday. I apologize for the delay.

I am more of small-intimate-personal celebration but since Benjamin had a 1st birthday party, I thought it was only fair. Plus first birthdays are a pretty big deal in this family! So...for Jason's party we went with a lumberjack because he is a tough little man.  

I created the invitation first (of course) and we centered all the decorations around that. My friend Yenni, from The Pink Door Decor, help set up my vision AND she made the amazing cake with a little surprise on the inside.  It was delicious!  So onward with the millions of photos...

Surprise! 

Yenni also made these cupcakes and the toppers! 

The surprise inside

Little favors

My dad :)

Ruben didn't get the memo in time! LOL

 We had a great time and Jason had a great time.
He didn't cry and was happy through out the whole party.
I can't believe how fast his first year went by! 

Almost there!

I'm back guys. I have been gone for a while, and this is because I am back in school. I am in my last semester now, and I am super excited that I will be finishing soon. It has not been easy, let me tell ya. The previous semester was very overwhelming! Now that I think back, I have no idea how I survived without losing my mind. God definitely kept me sane. 

I mean, apart from the usually late night essay writing and study sessions a student has, add the wife/mom responsibilities with church responsibilities AND then add sick baby. I mean at one point the whole family was sick. I'm pretty sure I was running on no sleep, and loads of coffee. It was tough. I just don't even want to think or talk about it. I am glad thats over and I passed all my classes, thank you Jesus!! 

This semester is suppose to be lighter. I mean, its only week 2, but so far, it seems to be okay. Plus I know this is the last, and I am almost there!  ALMOST THERE GUYS. YAY!  

I have so many things to share with you all!  Jason's first Bday, (he is walking now), Benjamin's first day of school, Holidays etc.  We need to catch up, but for now, just know that we are A-okay! 

 This was taken during a shopping trip with my sisters, a much needed break and time away from everything! 

A little about this, now, one year old

The day my baby Jay was born was exactly, one year ago. It's been ONE WHOLE YEAR.  I can’t even comprehend, Is this for real!? 

I don’t know if I am biased but Jason is just the cutest baby I have ever seen. Irresistibly cute. When I am my most tired, and trying to catch up on some z’s, I hear him get up.  With all my might, I desire for him to go back to sleep, but he doesn’t. He gets up, stands in his crib, and calls me and/or Ruben.  We avoid looking over because when we do, he sprouts the most precious smile you have ever seen, and we can’t help but walk over there and squish hug him!!  What can I say? He is very persuasive.

Well here is a little about this, now, one year old.

1.   He has a little 'tude.  It’s true! When this child gets angry, he gets angry.  He raises his little voice, and frowns his little face. It’s a very cute display of anger, I must admit.

2.   He loves to eat. He eats everything and anything.  It’s a piece of paper? Who cares! He will try and eat it. His pastime is crawling around looking for things to eat, so his mom (me), has to make sure that nothing, absolutely nothing, is on the ground.  Yay for me.

3.   He loves his mom more.  Exceptions: When dad is home.

4.   You have never seen dance moves like his. He practices any time he gets a chance.  Anytime!  Even in public, and he doesn't care who is looking. 

5.   When the bathwater starts running, you better move out of his way. In a split second there is serious determination is this youngling, and he will take out whatever tries to stop him from bath time.

6.    Jason has serious persuasion powers.  Be careful.  I’m telling you that smile will get you doing anything his little heart desires. 

Well that's enough for now.

Happy Birthday to Jason! 

Milestones

Jason turned 9 months on Monday.  9 MONTHS!!  I cannot believe how fast time has gone by.  (Did I really give birth 9 months ago?)

I am not quite sure how I feel about this post.  Bittersweet, I guess.  That seems to be the anthem of my life. One day you are a mother of one handsome little boy, and the next day you are welcoming another handsome little boy.  It seems like just a little while ago, I was only indulging in my own little selfish pleasures, and now I am all about selfless giving, and to 3 men, intentionally!!  Ahhh life.

In less than a month, Ruben and I will be celebrating our 6 year anniversary. Wow.  Shortly after that, Benji will start school. Double wow!... AND shortly after that, Jason will turn ONE!!  I am baffled by all these milestones and changes.  Life truly is a rollercoaster.

All I have to say is.. Thank you Jesus, Keep them coming!

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To Four!

My kids are both 4 and It’s probably the only time that will ever happen.  One is 4 years and the other is 4 months.  Jason turned 4 months and I am loving this stage of his life.  He is the cutest baby boy I have ever seen, and yes I am biased.  I can be. He is mine.

He’s so happy and smiley.  

It's SOOOO Adorbs. 

I love it when Jason wakes in the morning or after nap.  I hear him calling out to be rescued from the crib.  When I go over to him; his little eyes are closed and are struggling to open. After he finally gets his eyes open he sees me, and just gives me the most wonderful and gentle smile.  It’s my favorite part of the day.  (I posted a clip of it on Instagram)

At 4 months he:
-Does not need a haircut. (unlike Benji)
-Holds his head up,
-Reaches for things,
-Sits unassisted for like a minute
-Holds his bottle for like 2 seconds
-Rolls over with some arm assistance
-LOLs
-Screams in the middle of service, making everyone turn to look at me.
-Pulls the baby hairs on the back of neck.
-Tries to eat my face
-Smiles, laughs and plays with everyone.
-Is the cutest wittle babay! 

 Experts say (The expert being my dad. A title well deserved after having 4 beautiful girls *ahem) that at 4 months they begin to say mama or dada. ‘Til this day I haven’t heard a “mama” or “dada”.  So the big question is… What will he say first? The suspense.  I am constantly trying to get him to say at least “ma” but nothing.  Benji said Mama first, and only one time.  After that one and only time it was “dada.. dada.. dada.." blah blah yeah yeah.  I wholeheartedly refuse to believe this will be the case again.   It simply cannot be!  

What do you think he will say first?  

#TeamMama !!